Teaching social norms to children

I had a most hilarious conversation with my preschooler the other day which prompted me to want to embark on teaching social norms to her:

A: Mummy, Teacher XX (a male teacher) said he likes the ribbon on my panty.

Me: Erm, I really don’t think he does, darling. You mean you showed him your panty?

A: Yup.

Me: Darling, you don’t go round showing people your panties, you know?

A: Why?

Me: It’s just not right. No one goes around showing people their panties. And you cannot show especially men your panties, okay?

A: So who can I show my panties to?

Me: Errr, you can only show your panties to our family… like mummy and daddy.

A: Cannot! Cannot show daddy.

Me: Why?

A: Because daddy is a MAN.

*stunned silence*

———————

For this matter, I hardly believe that the male teacher actually said anything about her panties and even if he did, she’s probably the one who forced him to say what she wants to hear. You see, she really does go round announcing that she’s wearing new socks, a new blouse and of course, new panties. She even goes into details like, “XX, today, I’m wearing my new pink Angry Bird panties that my mummy bought!”

In her childish world, having a new pair of panties on is a really big thing and a piece of news that ought to be shared because that new item made her day. It’s something we adults feel too, especially when we wear new clothes or lingerie; the only difference being that we know better than to announce that we have something new on, underneath.

While I managed to teach her that she shouldn’t go round showing people, especially men, her panties, I still haven’t managed to get her to contain her excitement to not make public announcements, like on the bus. Nevertheless, we will try to work towards that while I secretly enjoy her childish innocence for now.

How do you teach social norms to children?

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Can babies paint? and other 13-month-old milestones

Dear Alex,

What they say about boys being natural daredevils must be true because I see it all in you. The scariest part of all is that you didn’t start doing dangerous things only after you turned one.

This is you at 11 months old, making your way into the trolley:

Tiptoe-ing on the trolley (!):

And you derive so much satisfaction from your stunt, you burst into laughter:

But apparently tiptoe-ing on the trolley is not enough for you. You seek greater thrill and you think dancing on the trolley is your cup of tea:


You used to climb onto the kids’ table. You’d sit on the yellow tabletop, triumphant, like you’d just scaled Mt Everest. But these days, you prefer to climb in and sit down on the red bench and swing your chubby legs about, pretending to be a good boy 🙂

Now that you are trying to walk – you can take a few steps, hurray! – you know mummy will always give you all the encouragement you need for this major milestone. Mummy doesn’t want to put undue pressure on you by making unnecessary comments about your not walking properly, unlike someone we know. Mummy understands perfectly that you are not walking yet because it is not time yet, your little body is building up the muscles that it needs to make sure that you get on the right footing, and not because you are lazy. How could you possibly be lazy when you try so hard that you even try to get up in your sleep to stand, try to balance and take a couple of steps? My poor boy, take it slow. You will learn that many great things in life will require you to have patience to succeed. You definitely have the perseverance bit in you though. 🙂

Now that you are 13 months old, you are acting up just like other little boys by keeping vegetables in places where it shouldn’t be. Holding the broccoli floret which you once loved to bits in your mouth for 10 minutes then spitting it out inside your shirt or on the sofa really doesn’t count as eating vegetables, you know? Veggies are good for you so I really hope you will pick up eating veggies again after I give you a break from it for awhile, just awhile.

You show a keen interest to hold the pencil to doodle, but you barely make any marks on the paper with the pencil because you have not learnt how to do so and your fine motor skills aren’t up to it yet. But you are so adamant and always want to participate when your sister is writing or colouring and so mummy really couldn’t resist letting you have a go at painting with your sister with do-a-dot markers which are just perfect for you at this stage.

I know sceptics would ask, can babies paint? Well, we’ll show them, yah?

Dotting around yesterday:

That’s you experimenting if you can dot with the bottle on its side:

and hey, how is it that nothing comes out when you hold it this way? Love that frustrated look on your face!

Having much fun!:

And when your sister takes the caps from you, you climb off the bench and complain to mummy:

Hmm, will jiejie notice if I took the whole basket away?

There! Finally got my hands on one cap and shoved it in!

There you see, you are quite the painter, though after awhile, your sole interest lies in possessing the bottle caps and trying to stuff caps into your mouth to check the potential of your newest tooth (the 6th one!) that cut through this month. Seriously, that looks more like food than cauliflower florets? I don’t see you doing that with cauliflower…

You even tried to suck from the paint bottle but of course mummy wasn’t so cool about it to let you do it and capture a picture of you doing that. Mummy often exposes you to lots of things and even potential dangers because there’s no point in keeping you wrapped up in a bubble. But know that mummy will be near you always, to make sure you don’t trip up too badly, not just now, but in your life.

My poor boy, you have been suffering from a chesty cough and a bad nose for the past few days, but I’m glad it is clearing up finally, with the help of the antibiotics.

All mummy wants for you is to be happy and healthy – get well fast, other things can wait.

Happy 13th month!

Luv,

Mummy

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Posted in Art, Homeschooling | 4 Comments